


The Xandenberg Disaster

by dustandroses



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Community: tamingthemuse, Ficlet, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-20
Updated: 2012-05-20
Packaged: 2017-11-05 16:18:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/408460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dustandroses/pseuds/dustandroses
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Xander is on the run.  (<i>Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered</i> revisited.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Xandenberg Disaster

**Author's Note:**

> **Prompt Notes:** Inspired by the Live Journal community Tamingthemuse prompt #304 - Dystychiphobia (the fear of accidents)  
>  **Notes:** Okay, two weeks in a row now, the Tamingthemuse prompt has stomped on me and laughed. But fortunately, I have friends like Trillingstar and Ozsaur, who put on their shit-kickers and stomped right back. This week, Trill suggested a play on the Buffy episode where Amy casts a love spell on Xander that has almost every woman in Sunnydale chasing him down. Bam. Just like that - I saw the light. Okay, so maybe not exactly like that. Actually, there was description of school buses and kiddies and even some ALL CAPS. So thanks, Trill! Hopefully, now that the moving is mostly out of the way, Xandercles will be back next week! Enjoy!

Xander slipped into the library as silently as he could, checking carefully to make sure no one was around before tiptoeing up the steps into the stacks, where he could hide behind shelves of books until Amy could fix this – this problem of his. Problem of _hers_ , really, since she was supposed to be casting this spell on Craig, not innocent bystanders like Xander. 

Okay, maybe not _totally_ innocent, since he _had_ blackmailed her into agreeing to cast a love spell for him, and maybe he should have just forgotten what he'd seen once he'd told Giles that she was casting spells on the teachers to make them think she was turning in her homework, but there Cordelia was, being her usual nasty, scornful self, and Xander couldn't help it, he wanted to hurt her the way she'd hurt him. Since this was the only way he could think of to do it, he'd agreed to help Amy with the spell she wanted to cast on that Craig kid she had a crush on and in return, Amy had agreed to cast a love spell for him tonight, once Xander'd gotten something that belonged to Cordelia. But that's not how it had worked. Amy said she'd only wanted to see if Craig was thinking about her, but suddenly it was _Xander_ Amy was thinking about, not Craig, and not just Amy – _everyone_ he ran into was thinking about him.

What if everyone who had ever _known_ him was thinking about Xander instead of what they were supposed to be thinking about? The ramifications could be deadly, and wouldn't Willow be proud of him for remembering the word ramifications from their History of the Americas class last year? But he wasn't about to remind her, because then she'd be thinking about him, and everyone else was already doing that, he didn't need anyone else thinking about him. This could be bad – it could even be dangerous! What if Leon, who drove his bus in grade school was thinking about Xander instead of the road signs and traffic lights? He could crash his busload of second graders on their field trip to the Science Museum and they could all die in a fiery inferno of screaming kiddies and blown-up body parts and it would be ALL XANDER'S FAULT! Oh, the humanity! What was he going to do when they pulled Leon's body out of the carnage and all he could whisper as he died was “Xander...”

“Xander!” A voice cut through Xander's panic, and he turned from his hiding place in the Algebra & Number Theory section of the Dewey Decimal System to discover Giles, who was holding a stack of books with a puzzled frown on his face. “How strange to find you here. I must admit, I was just thinking about you...”

Xander groaned, his head falling forward to thunk hollowly against a shelf. “You and everyone else, G-Man, you and everyone else...”


End file.
